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06-02-2010, 04:55 PM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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FBI Dog
This one is specially dedicated for DIMB (Clement):
FBI Dog
A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI.
"Well," says the personnel director, "you'll have to meet some strict requirements. First, you must type at least 60 words per minute."
Sitting down at the typewriter, the dog types out 80 words per minute.
"Also," says the director, "you must pass a physical and complete the obstacle course."
This perfect dog specimen finishes the course in record time.
"There's one last requirement," the director continues; "you must be bilingual."
With confidence, the dog looks up at him and says, "Meow!"
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-02-2010, 05:42 PM
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Petfinder Moderator
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Location: KL
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Re: FBI Dog
meow!! LOL....
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06-02-2010, 10:27 PM
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Animal Lover
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Location: Tmn Shamelin Perkasa-Kota Kinabalu
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FBI Dog
Muahahahahaha!!!!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by FurKids
This one is specially dedicated for DIMB (Clement):
FBI Dog
A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI.
"Well," says the personnel director, "you'll have to meet some strict requirements. First, you must type at least 60 words per minute."
Sitting down at the typewriter, the dog types out 80 words per minute.
"Also," says the director, "you must pass a physical and complete the obstacle course."
This perfect dog specimen finishes the course in record time.
"There's one last requirement," the director continues; "you must be bilingual."
With confidence, the dog looks up at him and says, "Meow!"
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06-03-2010, 11:32 AM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,041
Rep Power: 18
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Re: FBI Dog
FBI DOG: Moo moo moo!
MAN: Hey - you're a dog. How come you're going "moo moo moo"?
FBI DOG: I'm learning a foreign language!
FBI DOG: Cluck cluck cluck.
MAN: Hey - you're a dog. How come you're going "cluck cluck cluck"?
FBI DOG: I got tired of saying "moo moo moo"!
FBI DOG: Foow foow foow!
MAN: Hey - you're a dog. Shouldn't you be saying "woof woof woof"?
FBI DOG: My mother always said I was a little backward!
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 11:37 AM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Join Date: Sep 2008
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Re: FBI Dog
FBI Dog
How many dogs does it take to ....
These are the answers from dogs when asked "How many dogs does it take to put in a light bulb?"
Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb?
Border Collie: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid lamp!
Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Rottweiler: Go Ahead! Make me!
Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Let the servants. . . .
Labrador: Oh, me, me!!! Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Can I?
Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Doberman Pinscher: While it's dark, I'm going to sleep on the couch.
Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.
Hound Dog: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
Irish Wolfhound: Can somebody else do it? I've got a hangover.
Pointer: I see it, there it is, right there...
Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
Australian Shepherd: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 11:43 AM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Cat scan, anyone?
Cat scan, anyone?
A couple buys this cute little dog. They take him home and two days later the dog becomes very lazy. It won't eat, doesn't bark, heck it doesn't even move at all.
So the couple decides to take the dog to the Vet. The Vet looks at the dog and then lays it on the floor. He then brings a cat into the room and sets it beside the dog. The cat crawls all over the dog for several minutes and then runs around the dog four times before the Vet picks up the cat and puts him back in his cage.
The Vet then turns to the couple and says, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but your dog is dead... That'll be $225.00."
"$225.00?," screamed the outraged man. "You expect me to pay you that much just to tell me my dog is dead?"
The Vet replied, "It's only $25.00 for the office visit and $200.00 for the Cat Scan."
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 01:34 PM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Join Date: Sep 2008
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Re: FBI Dog
What do you call a great dog detective? Sherlock Bones.
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 01:38 PM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,041
Rep Power: 18
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Re: FBI Dog
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 01:40 PM
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Pets Are NOT Disposable
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,041
Rep Power: 18
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Re: FBI Dog
__________________
"We organized in the past to make Trap-Neuter-Return possible. Today, we organize to make Trap-Neuter-Return the norm and to end the unnecessary killing of cats in animal shelters across the country and provide humane care." - Alley Cat Allies
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06-03-2010, 05:45 PM
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Petfinder Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: KL
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Re: FBI Dog
Quote:
Originally Posted by furkids
"the reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue." -anonymous
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lol....
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